So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
