just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I wear drunk well.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
