maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize