I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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