at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize