That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
either way he was missing a nipple.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
