Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
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im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
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