jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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