I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
