when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough