Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
