It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize