WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
