somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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