Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
