therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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