her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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