chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
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