Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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