he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Shame is for Republicans.
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