My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
