You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
