I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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