singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
