And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
