She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
