I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Randomize
