I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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