So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
