I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
