quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize