remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
