I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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