just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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