I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize