finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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