Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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