so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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