he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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