Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize