She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
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