You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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