He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
