sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I wish i was in the wii world.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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