Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize