i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
