My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
