can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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