i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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