thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I think my vagina is haunted
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
