i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
